Ch. 12 Seeking Compliance in Interpersonal Relationships – Blog 1
The beginning of chapter 12 discusses compliance gaining goals, plans, and actions (p. 365). The text states that we tend to seek compliance in our interpersonal relations by first developing a goal. After a goal has been established, we begin making plans that will enable us to achieve that goal. Finally, we put into action the plan we’ve created to achieve the goal.
I’ve witnessed this sequence of compliance gaining not only among close interpersonal relationships, but also among strangers. My husband and I like to frequent Crissy Field in San Francisco. It’s our favorite spot in the city, because it’s clean, fresh, and you get great views of the downtown, the bay, and Golden Gate Bridge. People often bring their pets to the park, and “courtesy stations,” if you will, with plastic bags and garbage cans have been placed throughout the park in an effort to encourage pet owners to pick-up after their animals. One afternoon, as my husband and I were strolling through the park, we saw someone’s dog drop a load in the middle of a walkway. My husband instantly went into “compliance seeking mode.” The goal was to get the dog’s owner to recognize that it was his responsibility to pick up after his animal and thus contribute to keeping the walkway clean. The plan was to get the owner’s attention and inform him that it was his dog who left the mess. The action steps involved first informing the owner that his dog did “the deed” and then providing the owner with a solution. The owner of the culprit first looked at the pile as if he didn’t know what to do with it. It was then that my husband pointed to a trash can and said, “…there are plastic bags there that you can use to pick it up and throw it away.” My husband followed the goal-planning-action sequence in order to attain his goal of keeping a clean Crissy Field.
1 comment:
I like how you took one of the compliance-gaining strategies and related it to a real life situation with your husband. This made the compliance-gaining strategy concept come to life more for me and cause me to realize that I, too, do this on a daily basis. One action that I realized that I take is when I'm at work and people are talking really loud in the main lobby by the front desk. I am a receptionist, and it is extremely hard to answer and hear calls when someone is shouting right in front of your desk. I take a more indirect approach to getting the person in the lobby to quiet down. I simply say, to the caller, "I'm sorry, but it's really loud in here, I can barely hear you." If the guest still doesn't realize what I'm getting at, I'll say, "I'm sorry but there is loud talking in front of my desk," etc. Some people may think that this is rude, but it works! haha.
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